August 24, 2011

Coffee Rant - Kona Classic

 There exists a rip in the fabric of time and space.  The anomaly is centered around the coffee beans grown in the Hawaiian islands.  Kona is the frontrunner of these.  The Hawaiian islands are special to us American coffee imbibers because they are in the tropical belt that coffee plants prefer.  And they happen to be the only U.S. state in that geographical belt.

Kona, being a precious commodity, is often blended with other coffees.  Other things of note that are blended:   House paint, Margaritas, and a peculiar blend of 14% wood pulp and 86% water.

Boiling water percolated over dehydrated grounds, mixed with the blissful shards of the Hawaiian islands.  Flying fish... and possibly a dab of pykrete.

August 8, 2011

Coffee Rant - Iced Coffee

A paradox of the senses.  Something that seems to be so wrong, yet somehow turns out ok.  Iced coffee: an experiment gone wrong?  There has always been those who seek to be 'first' in the discovery of new things.  Those who venture into unfamiliar territory.  Nine times out of eight, these wrong turns end up a failure.  However, in that implausible moment, there exists the spark of discovery.  A new element... a new molecule... a new beverage.
The precise wrong turn that started people drinking cold coffee hasn't been revealed to us by history.  I imagine it was out of necessity... somewhere in a horrific war.  The valiant surviving veteran returned home with a palate for the unusual.  A taste for the tepid flavors of cold coffee.

Or perhaps it was something that only could of been conceived in the Space Age.  The relatively passive discovery of freeze-dried ice cream has led to us to the greater advance in the science of Iced Coffee.  Who knows what strange boundaries are yet to be transgressed in the pursuit of coffee.

Bold and out of this earthy.